Summer fun!

So, it has been wonderful having the kids here! Joseph is so tall, Rachel is still Rachel :), and Micah is as sweet as always. Their all growing up so fast! They have been here since the 10th and so far we have been at my Aunts house with their 3 kids, all about the same ages as Joseph, Rach, and Micah. We have been to Oklahoma seeing my Mom and Dad, we have been to the water park, and to Arkansas seeing my Grandparents on their farm. We have been Kayaking and fishing, also. We have stayed busy and I really don't know where the time has gone! Tomorrow we are going to the Blue Bell Ice Cream factory, the Zoo and the Aquarium. We have lots of pics and all in all have had a wonderful time. We will be taking the kids back on the 27th, so our time is drawing to its end...
But we have had a great time! I'll be posting pics soon :)

A busy day

Today I am rushing around trying to get everything cleaned up and the house ready for Joseph, Rachel, and Micah to get here. It has been crazy lately. Between being sick and healing so slowly, to all the loss that we have had to experience in the past few weeks.
I am working for a marketing company now, my first day is the 13th. I have to go and buy a new pair of black slacks as well as send in the rest of my paper work. I also, am thinking that at some point I am going to have to make time to go back to the Dr. because my medicine is making me become even more sick then I was. I now think I am getting thrush in my mouth, this medication is by far the worst I have ever been on. Not only am I healing slowly, I am getting sick from it. But, I do understand that my infection is awful, so I needed an extremely high medication.
So, some how I have to find out how to clean the house, get it ready, see the Dr., buy clothes for work on Sat. and send off my paper work... I so don't see me getting this all done in a DAY! One day... Only one day, because I am suppose to meet Ryan and the Kids in AR. tomorrow...
Oh my, I just never have time to be sick!

After I am done with my medication I will be going back into the Dr. to be looked over once more. They will be checking at that time if my tubes are working or if I have to have everything taken out... We are praying that God heals me and I don't have to have that done.

Ryan and I have tried to get pregnant for a while now. But, we have come to realize that God might not want us to have children that way. He just might want us to give a child a home that didn't have one before. To show them the love that they should be shown.

Ryan and I are not trying anymore, at least for a while. With all that my body has gone through and everything life has thrown at us with the loss of two babies, and losing two pets in such a short time, we need to breath... We need a break, without so much heartache..

But God does know best, and we have handed it all over to him.

Please Pray for Ryan and the kids as they make there way here tomorrow!! And Pray that I get everything ready :)

*We will post about Ryan and the Kids trip to FL. once they get here with there pics. :)*

Illyanna's 1st Birthday

Anna had her first birthday on the 5th and I was there to enjoy all the wonderful mess of the cake as well as the two birthday parties she ended up having :) Ryan is still in FL. with Stephen and Justin as well as the kids. He will be home on Thursday. So Ryan missed out on this memorable moment but I'm sure he will make up for is once he is home. Anna loves him!! As does he love her as well. :) If you notice in the pics. she have something on her head, those are her sunglasses that Uncle Ryan and Aunt Tia got her. She will hardly take them off now, hehe. I'm glad she loved them so much!

It's so hard to believe that we have already celebrated her 1st b-day! Time sure have flown by.
She is such a blessing, such a joy. It would have been so much harder to get through all the hardships that Ryan and I have gone through in the last few weeks without that smiling face of her's and those beautiful baby blue eyes :)

She is a big Granddaddy's girl :)




I am very proud to be this little girls Aunt. :) She is such a wonderful little girl!! :)
She got a lot of cute clothes and toys for her birthday and enjoyed her time, very much so :)
I am so glad that I was able to be there for it!

A very hard day...

Today is a very hard day.. We have had to put our beloved Cat, Mr. Sparkles down. We took him to the vet today because he was great and then all of the sudden he started going down hill. We found out that either his liver was being attacked or that his red blood cells were... We had to choices to choose between, either hook him up on I.V. and do a bunch of test or let him rest in peace and not hurt any more. We talked over the pros and cons of both and decided that it would be best for him if we would let him go. The vet told us that she would be more the willing to hook him up and run all the test, but that she felt it would do nothing more then keep him alive. But, he would never really get better... He simply went to sleep in my arms as I brushed him and he was given the shot. He was ready to go, he was ready to be out of pain and in heaven waiting on us.

Today I also found out that my baby Isabella passed away this last weekend when I was in the hospital. I was not told until now because I was so sick and everyone knew that I would want to give up and my body would not have been healing. Today, I have lost my 8yr old child. I never knew that I could feel this much pain and sickness. I did not think it possible for one to live through. I had her since she could fit in my hand, I was always talking about her and when she was not with me I would call and check on her and even talk to her over the phone.. Silly as it may seem, she was my baby, my child. We are not sure what happened to her, we just know that she was outside and then all of the sudden she was no longer alive..

Please pray that Ryan and I both can get past this pain and loss.

In loving Memory Of Mr. Spark & Izzy

Moving & Life up until now

As we have embarked on a new journey and embrace a new chapter of our life-we are having to say goodbye to a place that holds so many dear memories to us. Our first home together, the place that has held all or most of our "first" together. Some things you can never get back once you have lived them once already, all of you're "first". Life has been stressful from day one of packing. The move it's self went well. Mom and Dad came to help us and we had the U-Haul packed in one afternoon, or rather in a few hours after picking it up. We worked our hind ends off to make this all happen. It was all worth it, though. We had a lot of goodbye's and see-you-soon's that had to be said, and although they where sad themselves, they also had there own happy moments along with them.


The Kids, aka animals, were not so sure what to think about everything.
So, Ben tried to sleep most of the days while packing.
Piper, however, was all about watching and getting into trouble. She just knew I needed one more thing to clean up and thought it was so much fun to tear all her toys up. But, you gotta love the babies :) Lilly was to busy all day messing with the frogs to think much of anything about the moving boxes all around.
While Mr. Spark was so worried about us making him move from where he was sleeping all the time.



By the end of the day Mr. Spark and I plus the rest of the family were beat. Between having mixed feeling about moving and being sad about that plus being happy about finely being packed-the day was full of emotions that just simply can not be put in words.







We left Colorado Springs, CO. on 8 May 2009 at 0500.
Dad lead in the truck with Ryan following and Mom and I in close pursuit behind him. It was was an emotional trip but a good one as well. We all kept each other going and made it a fun experience as well.




Once we made it to Oklahoma everyone knew we were on the home stretch and even though we were all getting tired it seemed to give us a second wind that we had been needing. :)



We made it to our new home around 8pm that evening. We got a bit behind but still made it in time to go to bed at a good time. It was wonderful being out of the car and having a bed to sleep on! Some how the floor gets harder as we get older, I'm sure of it ;) It can't be age saying "Hi" it's got to be the floor getting harder. :)



We stayed in OK. getting things around a bit and then headed into AR. to see all the family there. Ryan and Anna had some play time out at the school while we watched Miss Emmy's track and field day. Seeing the family in AR. again was wonderful and much needed. For some reason it is a great stress reliever for Ryan and I both when we are there, maybe it is that life is just simple back there and is down to earth, I don't know. But I do know we love it.






I am a super proud Aunt :) and we just found out the my brother and his wife are expecting another little bundle!! I can't wait to be an Aunt again. But this girl, with those baby blues, will always be my little angel :) I love her bunches!!! She is a sweetheart!





Ryan and I have had a lot of emotional news since moving back home. I found out that I was Pregnant but no sooner did I find out that I was I found out that I was miscarrying the baby as well. I would not have, but I got an infection earlier in May and didn't know about it until it was to late to stop the miscarriage. My white blood cell count was 28,000 and I was in the ER. When in the ER they were thinking about keeping me because I was so sick that if I had not of made it to the ER the day I did, I would have went in a coma by the following day...
But, God is good and has taken care of me. He saw it that I made it in and that I was taken care of. Now, we are having to work on getting me better and that is not going as well. I am healing very slowly and the infection is taking it's own sweet time going away. I might have to have my right tube and ovary taken out depending on how well I heal. If that happens then it is God's will that it does. We are just so thankful that God is taking care of us and helping us get through this hard time.

Ryan is doing great back home. He is enjoying working outside with Mom and on the farm.
He is becoming himself again! The fun loving, not so stressed guy! He will be going down and picking his siblings up here soon to spend a few weeks with us for the summer! We can't wait to have them here! It will be great. :) Ryan, is working on getting in college right now for Computer Networking. He wants to start this coming fall, so that is wonderful.
I have applied for a job at the Library and had my interview today. It went well, but it still might be a few weeks before I hear back about it. Ryan and I are talking about building a house now. We have found out that we can build and buy property for around $70,000. We also could move into out new home within around a month.
So that is something we are talking about.

Well, it is midnight here and I am super tired from being sick and everything.
I will keep everyone posted and up to date more on this, I promise :)


*Sorry for any mistypes, it's been a LONG day*